谁也和我一样
睡梦中突然惊醒
失眠了将近一个小时
眼光光地看着刺眼的电脑荧幕
也不懂该干些什么
最令我头疼的是 明天10点还得上课去
在班上打瞌睡如何是好呢？
眼睛很痛 头很痛
心 更是痛

我是一个negative thinker
我爱乱想
我爱被负面情绪牵着鼻子走
但 有没有试想过
这一切 都是因为我也和你一样
缺乏安全感
更因为我快离开了
更被一层层不安的情绪笼罩着
祸从口出
我承认 那都是我没经大脑说出来的话
有够难听 有够刻薄的
原来伤害别人的同时
我仿佛拿着一把锋利的刀子往自己的心里划
很痛很痛 痛得撕心裂肺
大概是内疚感在作祟
多少公升的眼泪也无法掩盖那种痛
更没办法清洗我的罪
毕竟说了就是说了
伤口就算愈合了 伤痕依然存在

我还是很想崩溃痛苦
眼泪原来是不会流干的
源源不绝地在提供给我

可是
我没有要放弃
抓住了就不该轻易说放开

别看我平时那么man
其实 我的内心是多么的脆弱啊
我只是需要一个拥抱
让我知道你还在乎 :)

Happy 100th Daysary ♥

Today is a very special and memorable day for us,
♥14/12/11 ♥
Our 100th Daysary as well as Valentine's Hug Day!
Sorry ya,
that gift was the only surprise I could made,
hope you don't mind!
The another thing that I promised to make will compensate for next time.
Hmmm, when is it?
Bleh :P Not gonna tell you of course!
Tryna keep the romance and spark in our relationship,
making surprise is one thing that boyfriend/girlfriend won't be able to resist, true?
We still got a long long way to go,
love, care, tolerance, trust, honesty,
all of these are the essential elements of maintaining a relationship.
I might transfer to another school after done foundation,
we couldn't stick together most of the time like now,
turning us into a long distance relationship,
I'm not feeling like leaving here though.
Making us hard time dealing with separation, hate that! :(
So, I truly treasure every moment between us,
I'll love you more and more,
cherish you, support you, always be there for you my whole life through.
I'm willing to be your koala bear forever and ever!
I Love you ♥

Shi Lei and Min Jia said that we got fu qi lian,
he himself realized that too!
The longer a couple stay together, the more they look like each other,
that's what we called fu qi lian 夫妻脸 :)
There's a saying that,
'a couple who look-alike find perfect love' ♥
I hope, and believe this is true.

Just want you to be happy

天真以为一切很快就平静下来
原来被伤害过 心中的伤口并不能这么容易痊愈
这道伤痕能够完全地复合吗？
我还能感受到左侧的胸口在隐隐作痛

需要一个属于自己的地方崩溃地大哭一场
不是不愿告诉你我的心声
不是因为你不是我理想的倾诉对象
只是我不想在你不愉快的时候加重你的负担
部落格是我的小小避风港
我写的 都希望你能耐心地去读每一个字
当你不在我身边时
下雨了 刮风了
部落格永远都为我小小的心灵遮风挡雨
其实我宁愿将所有的不快乐都自己扛 都让自己承受
放心 我没事
这小小的伤算什么？
不足以打击我对我们之间的坚持和信任
一切 我都只想你快乐

对不起
我依然太差劲了
依旧不合格
我会好好检讨自我

31211

Sem 2 is going to end very very soon,
meaning final exam is approaching.
Experience teaches fool,
learned a great lesson from last semester exam,
no pain, no gain,
I should study harder if really wanna get a good result.
How embarrassing when people around asking me,
'How's your studies? How's your result?'

QUOTE OF THE DAY:
Success is 90% hard work and 10% talent.

'I'm stupid', it's always a worst excuse to cover the ugliness of my last sem result,
it's all because I'm lazy admittedly.
I should give studies the highest priority for now,
no studies, no bright future, I told myself.
Are you willing to work hard together with me?
If yes, please fulfill what you've promised,
it ain't easy, but please try your best,
I hope I could be a motivator of yours.

Kay, let's flash back to the past few weeks.
Was following my man went to KL to visit his friends,
all of them are so nice and friendly to me!
Had a whale of time with them,
Mei Wee, Bee Lee, Nicholas, Kaa Ee, Edward,
thanks for taking care of us that few days,
heart you guys! <3


Last week,
I brought him back finally, WOOHOOO~~
Everything went very well :)



Was enjoying abalone set dinner at Unique Seafood Restaurant,
sadly I was just went for monthly braces review,
the dentist tightened my teeth, and the pain can really kill me off!
What I can say is, it is kinda cheap, cost only RM 99 for the whole set dinner,
with grilled prawn, fish fillet, fried rice, and a so called shark fin soup.


We ordered crabs too,
my man was picking the crab meat for me,
SO SWEET~~
Nahh, the role model for all boyfriends, hahahaha!

And this week, busying for the sketch.
Proudly to be the first group to perform,
yet audience gave us the cold situation, duh.
Whatever, we'd tried our best! *claps for us*
'Teen Angels'

I'm like a koala bear huh?
Hugging a big+tall tree, lol.
Couldn't be helped, he's too fat, hahahahahaha!!

Yesterday, 2/12/11,
our dear cute cute Min Jia's 18th b'day,
we planned to give her a surprise,
touching right?




Last but not least,

@@ + his don't know what face expression.

Truth?

The genuine truth behind truths
真相背后的真相
寻找了答案又如何？
宁可相信自己 相信值得相信的人
用一段友情 买了一个教训
太贵了 不过也许是值得

Money is the root of all evil
水 可载舟亦可覆舟
钱 可助人亦可害人
人类竟可为了金钱而丧失本性丧失理智丧失良心
如今的社会怎么那么残酷无情呢？
太恶劣 太可怕了

一念天堂 一念地狱
一念之差 往往就会造成无法弥补的错误


你想享受天堂的快乐 还是一尝地狱的炼火？

夜

今晚我要当个夜猫子 不睡了
深夜 是多么的静谧丫
静得也有点儿可怕
读着读着 有点儿闷了
这里 就是我最好的避风港
轻音乐也发挥了它最佳的作用
陪伴着我度过这一个漫长的夜晚

念书 不是我的嗜好
也不能怎样
这就是人生其中一道必经之路
我告诉自己 熬过了 晴天就来了

一直把等价交换原则放在身旁
激励自己努力耕耘才有好的结果

成绩 算是什么？
我讨厌以成绩衡量自己
可是社会就是那么地现实残酷

醒悟吧 人类
不努力的话 你妄想得到些什么？

坚持也许是好事
可是把坚持放在一个不可能有结果的事情上
就是执著 浪费青春
那又何必呢？
放开自己 放开过去 是一种释怀
寻找另一片属于自己的天空飞翔吧
天空无边无际 总有一个角落能够容纳你

而我坚持些什么？
我坚守原则 我有我规矩 我有我性格
不必伪装 这就是最真实的我

乱了乱了
思绪乱掉了
继续赶夜车读书去

祝 一切安好

Happy 2nd Monthsary ♥

A Love Theme - Olivia Ong

I love you I love you I love you I do I love you I love you I love you I do I love you I love you I love you I do I love you I love you I love you I do I can see the colours in your eyes My feelings arise And the mirror catches on to what We feel deep inside Playing off the colours in your eyes nderneath the starry skies I don't have to ever make believe As the gaze turns wide and bright Baby the smile you see It's everything I want it to be I know just how I feel This is how it should always be You have always been a nice surprise Of sorts for me Baby baby you make me believe In all my dreams You don't ever have to second guess Right now I do confess When I think of love I think of you Now you know I want you too I'm falling into the stars I catch me a shooting star And I place it near my heart This love won't come apart

6/11/2011
♥ Happy 2nd Monthsary ♥

Peace yeah!

Okay,
promised my man to be generous though you crossed my line,
'cuz there's no reason for me to fight back.
You're so damn insignificant and tiny in my eyes.
Haters and destroyers did play an important in my life seriously,
they taught me to be tough, be strong and be matured,
thanks! *非凡哥
Go ahead dude!
Do and say whatever you want.

I don't give a shit anymore.
*am trying mua best.

Like what Chuckei Baby Jane said,
'Always keep in mind that they are nothing to you but you are something to them. Imagine how cool you are when you actually affect their lives and they dont?'

'I understand your resentment. But all revenge does is give birth to more revenge. You must persevere.’–Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood

'You must endure. “Enduring” and “forgiving” are two different things. You must not forgive the unjustness of society. As a human being, you must hold the event in contempt. Yet, you must endure. You must put an end to the chain of hatred!' –Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood

Life Lesson: Good things will not come out of feelings of revenge and hate, only more of it.


PEACE! ;)

Beware of Destroyer

Can't stop camwhoring after downloading a new apps - 360 Camera
Love the japanese style effect to the max!

Look at my messy hair,
reminding me it's time to go for a haircut,
though I feel like keeping a long hair.

Unfinishable tests start next week onwards,
gonna be very busy liaooo.
Especially Maths 2,
tons of tutorial questions kill me off,
admittedly I hate Maths like hell.

Am staying sweet with my man,
meanwhile, someone feels so jealous and started to curse us.
Like what Scars in Fullmetal Alchemist said,
"If there are creators then there are also destroyers."
This is so true!
Me and my man are the creators of our love story,
while that dumbass is the destroyer.

You said that you are telling the so called 'truth' even you know that's hurt.
And you are so proudly think that you are the savior of our relationship,
acting like you know everything bout us.
Truth huh? It's all fake story you made.
And you told this is how a true friend should be?
LMAO!
To me, you are nothing, may be just a shitass?
Sad case for you, nothing can separate us,
not even tsunami nor typhoon.
Do you think you can own my man by hurting and teasing us so deep?
Jealousy and hatred had poisoned your mind kiddo,
don't be so naive, please wake up before it's too late.

My man told me to be generous,
and I'll try my very best not to hate you,
but I don't like you either.
I'm not that fake!
Doesn't mean I'm not mature enough too,
it's just that, I can't deceive myself to be good to you as before anymore!
Sometimes an open enemy is better than a false friendship,
however, I chose to endure you.

Hmmm,
just feeling like venting,
ignore me! LOL.

:(

突然发觉我们之间多了一层隔膜

我猜不透你的心在想什么

我尝试去关心 去了解 去明白

似乎你的心上了锁

而我却没有这把钥匙去打开你的心扉

到底怎么了？

到底那些句子是什么意思？

我突然有一种不懂得如何面对你的感觉

突然想去避开你

因为每当我看到你一副心事重重的脸孔

总是让我觉得你额外陌生

我真的会不知所措

看见你不开心

你要我怎么笑出来？

突然好像去海边

独自一人到海边走走

听着海浪声吹这海风

把负能量+不愉快的心情都带走吧

可惜 金保就只有湖边 呵呵

231011 ♥

Presentation ruined my day
星期三度过了这个学期第一个低潮谷底
我的心简直就像掉进无底深潭
跌得好深 跌得好痛
又是一次高估自己的教训
果然这世上等价交换原则是存在的
代价——丢脸
丢了自己的脸 也丢了对我满怀期望的他们的脸
这种感觉真的狠狠地把我给杀了

我当时多么地需要一个肩膀让我依靠让我哭泣
为什么当时的你却没给？
你懂吗？我真的很心痛！
我告诉你 我emo的时候 我真的可以一声都不吭的

放学后 你紧紧地把握抱着
我终于哭了
你一直安慰我说尽力就好
我还是把你给推开
我很野蛮对不？
你也流泪了 过后再紧抱我
这次无论我再怎么用力推开你
你都不肯放开我



其实 当时我在意的是
为什么在我最需要的时候给予我安慰和鼓励的是Marv
而不是你？:(

算了 都已经过去了
也许那一刻你真的不懂该怎么安慰我
我也承认自己的情绪波动很大
就只会把你当成沙包
对不起

这世上有谁会完美呢？
每个人都有自己的优点 缺点
你能忍受我的大小姐脾气就已经很了不起了
常常都会听说 “爱一个人要包容他的一切，包括缺点”
可是真正做得到的人 到底有多少个呢？
何不把他的缺点看成一种优点呢？

他 桃花运旺
证明我没选错对象
他 对别人过分地好
证明他是个gentleman
他 爱捣蛋
这是他的可爱之处
他 有时候很酷 感觉自己没办法了解他
酷？可能就是被他这一点吸引住吧
怎么没办法了解他呢？这告诉我要好好多关心多疼他
他 有时候很懒惰
我终于能够担起一份工作——激励他一起和我奋斗

那天 谈到了未来
我说 理想的结婚年龄大概26/27岁
对 还有8~9年
这是个爱情马拉松
你会愿意陪我跑吗？

我问 你以后会娶我吗？
他说 不敢保证 不敢答应
因为距离8年还有好久好久
谁也不能担保当中会发生什么事
我再一次在他面前哭了
我在想 是你不想 还以你觉得自己会爱上别人
他一边擦干我的眼泪 一边问我怎么了
我摇头说没事
他说 你market比我好 我是怕你在KL读书时会爱上别人 我要的就只是你

我真的不奢求你给我承诺
更不应该有这种要求
我们都还很年轻
还有好长好远的路要走
我们都不该答应对方不保证能做到的事情
承诺不是儿戏 它是一种责任
都是以前太天真太无知了
才会造成很多无法磨灭的伤害
其实自己都知道根本没有能力兑现诺言

况且 我怎么会轻易放开自己的理想情人呢？
常常以前都会幻想自己的男友高大威猛的运动男
梦想实现了 我还能要求什么？
我真的很庆幸自己有你
知足了 :)

昨晚 我真的很想随你去badminton court
他说 我怕你会闷
怎么会呢？ 其实我喜欢看他打羽毛球
更何况 我还有Ace和NDS陪我丫
他也许不懂
昨晚看着他一副认真打球杀球的样子
真的很帅很有型 :)

说真的
男人认真做事的样子都是特别帅

有时候我会怀念之前暧昧的日子
我还经常会读之前的信息
虽然很短暂 却很回味
除了热恋期
最甜滋滋的就是友达以上 恋人慰满的阶段了
不 正确来说 是酸甜的滋味
我喜欢你 却不知道你是否也一样
仿佛是 仿佛不是
你靠近我的时候 对我加倍关心的时候
都像是被触电一样
当然 我也很珍惜现在


爱你的感觉
每天都在增加
真的连望着你的背影 我都会笑
中毒了中毒了
但一切一切
我都愿意 ♥

Taste our sweetness

On Monday, both of us just came back to Kampar from hometown,
and prepared to go for ECS class.
So sad, poor bf was having stomach ache,
and for sure, he skipped the class.
'Hmmm, you wanna dump me is it...?' I said,
and then he said: 'so sorry my dear, will compensate back.'
I was like, 'Okay lorr, fine, fine, just wait and see how you compensate.'

Guess what?
He slipped into my room while I was still having the class,
planning to make me a surprise.

When I just reached home,
I actually didn't notice anything on my desk,
when I put my files and keys on the desk,
I was like, AWWWWWW, AM I DREAMING???
SO SO SO SURPRISED!!!




I never ever thought of it you know?
I never thought that your compensation was such a great surprise!
Maybe it looks nothing much, but for me, it's so so so valuable,
and this is the sweetest thing I ever had.
YOU TOUCHED MY HEART,
YOU MADE MY TEARS DROPPED!!
I felt like rushing to your house to hug you,
and telling the whole world I got a BEST BF!


Love it!

Being in love with you is so great, my man!
Not because of the surprises nor presents you gave me,
it's all because of your love, your care, your tenderness.
Thanks for being so great to me,
I really appreaciate it :)
A simple word to tell you, my man,
ILY (I ♥ YOU)
for now and the rest of my life,
because you're worth it :) ♥


A box filled with LOVE, heehee ♥

Taste the rainbow, taste our sweetness!


Savanna, 5.5% alcohol with apple flavor, nice but kinda dry.
(No idea what it actually meant by dry, feeling dryness in throat after drinking it perhaps?)

Good girl goes bad huh? How dare you!
Nonono, I wasn't, don't worry peeps!
Admittedly I went to pub (or bar?),
just a normal yamcha session,
taking of 1 bottle of Savanna and chatting with his friends, that's all.

Last but not least, end the post with the photo of us ♥
TAA-DAA-!!

Cousin Yumi said I was like hugging a tree,
he's so HUGE, making me look so TINY,
like a GIANT with a lil DWARF.
Hmmm, well, 'distance' of 28cm shouldn't be a problem,
as long as we love each other, right?

♥♥♥

*眼袋依然好重好重

有些事情不经意地曝光了总比刻意隐藏舒服好多
别误会 我绝对不是那种easy come easy go的play girl
姐姐说：
“慢慢来，看好好再选”
也许像朋友说的吧
感觉来了谁也挡不住
这不是因为一时空虚而造成的错觉
开始的时候也许觉得太快
但是当我们在一起了
很自然就会停下脚步 满满用心经营和养育我们的爱苗
因为爱情是细水长流的
我们都正在互相了解当中

你这个人 很酷很酷
这就是我踏进班上对你的第一印象
我以前都在想：
“为什么这个人总是不爱说话？为什么那么酷？
有时候看似心事重重？你的心到底在想些什么？
在线上你却可以那么热情？”
当认识你一段时间后
“你对别人真的无法形容地好
原来你很gentleman”

我记得你说过你这个人没什么情绪
结果昨晚你还是因为我坚持不喝cough syrup而生气了
我真的有被吓到
但我还是很高兴
至少我知道你是紧张我的
你昨晚问我
“你觉得我疼你吗？”
你说呢？你不只疼我 你在宠我了

我喜欢我们的相处方式
我们都给对方足够的私人空间
这都是我以前无法拥有的
偶尔吵吵嘴 打打闹闹
只是我们最大最大的距离就是——高度
你吃什么可以吃到你那么高大啊
你说 你根本不介意我的娇小
可是我好害怕出街被别人笑

你常说我很爱胡思乱想
谁叫你桃花比我好？
可以不要再乱漏电吗先生？
尤其是用你的那对双眼皮的眼睛
你说你多了很多enemy
先生，我也怕自己被麻包袋盖着打

我很喜欢看你打pool
不懂为什么 就是特别特别有魅力
我更希望自己能亲眼看你打badminton
Marv说我：
“哎~你中毒太深了，没办法医治了”
哈哈

明年我很大可能会离开Kampar了
你说 别担心 你会常常去KL找我
但是我知道你的心是不舍得我
只是你从来都不爱说出口
那天你对York Han说：
“我很不放心她”
我有开心到
我也一样不放心更不舍得你
虽然你不常亲口对我说甜言蜜语
这更显得它有多珍贵

我说你这banana的英文比我好
我的中文却比你好
我们可以互相学习互相欣赏
老实说 我曾经担心你会嫌弃


虽然你把我名字的笔画写错了
但是我知道你已经很努力地在学习怎么去写我的中文名字
心意满满 :)

爱情就是应该从互相了解
互相吸引，互相欣赏，互相学习，互相包容，互相尊重，互相迁就，互相信任，互相支持，坦诚相对
好的情人是多重身份的
是情侣也是朋友
我们互相爱护互相扶持互相依存
你知道我们都还很年轻
你不敢给我承诺
不要太早有承诺 这是对的
承诺既美丽也残忍
只要我们还相爱的一天 已经在兑现互爱的约定了

谢谢蕾蕾与我分享情侣之间的相处之道
我每一天都在学习如何做一个好女友兼好学生




Nom nom nom
两人的第二晚餐

我在想 你看这篇文章一定会看到很痛苦
Google translate到你吐血 哈哈
没关系 别怕 有我这个人肉翻译机在 不是问题